Marriage Mondays: Making Marriage FREE!

EXCITING NEWS COMING TOMORROW! Be sure to stop back in to Come Have a Peace!

Do you feel like a prisoner in your marriage? There's the "prisoner of love" kind of captivity, and then there's the "trapped in shackles" kind of bondage. What has a hold on you? Maybe you feel like a prisoner because you are.

Today at Do Not Depart I'm sharing about finding freedom and staying in it. What better place in life to apply this than in MARRIAGE? If we're looking to break away from things that enslave and defeat us, the answer is found in Christ. Read my post about DO. GO. STAND.  So how about finding and keeping freedom in marriage?

DO. GO. STAND.  in the wonderful world of marriage.

Photo by David Castillo Dominici

Why would anyone want to be married, but feel empty and imprisoned? That kind of relationship is on a slow slide down the hill of corrosion. In a marriage like that, the relationships and life around them fall apart. God doesn't want us to live that life either; He purchased our freedom from what would enslave our marriages. He broke the shackles of bitterness, unfaithfulness, pornography, unforgiveness, laziness, lying, and every other sin that robs a marriage of its freedom. "You were bought with a price; do not become bondservants of men" (1 Cor. 7:23). If you want to stay together ... be free.

Freedom is in God's presence. You GO girl!  Go to God's presence daily to find the freedom from sin and hang ups that threaten to keep your marriage from being all it can be!

To have a free marriage, we have to live in God's Spirit and walk out that fruit daily. "Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom" (2 Cor. 3:17). Our flesh battles God's Spirit in us. If you want to be free .... stay in the Spirit. (Galatians 5:16-25)

Once we experience freedom, the challenge is to stand firm in it and not use it as an excuse for our own selfishness, dysfunction, or stubbornness. "Live as people who are free, not using your freedom as a cover-up for evil, but living as servants of God" (1 Peter 2:16).  Our marriages miss out on freedom when we return to our evil habits. "For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery" (Galatians 5:1). Prisoners don't willingly go back to their chains.  If you've got freedom ... don't use it to cover up evil.  

Pray about DO. GO. STAY. in your marriage .... Would you be willing to ask God to show you if there are areas you're covering up?  Areas where you're not living by the Spirit? Ways that He wants to grow the freedom in your marriage? Freedom is found in His presence .... Go there. 

If you want to be stay together ... be free!
If you want to be free ... stay in the Spirit!
If you've got freedom ... don't use it to cover up evil!

Do you love your shower scum?

Have you ever said, "That's just the way I am"?  I know I have, but those 6 words are packed with meaning like:

• so don't expect me to change
• so when I blow it, don't bother confronting me
• so if I offend you, deal with it
• and I just don't know how to change it
• but I've tried to conquer it, and I feel defeated in that area
• and the Holy Spirit doesn't need to go messin' with that flaw

I've been wearing a new fragrance. It's called "essence of bleach." It started when I decided to try and save a few minutes by cleaning the shower ... AS I shower. I left a bottle of Soft Scrub with Bleach (LOVE that stuff) and a stiff scrub brush in the shower corner. While my conditioner's doing it's thing, I do my cleaning thing.

I thought I would just take care of the clumpy soap bubble build up, because I knew that the stains are exactly that:  stains. I've even blamed them on "those last people" who lived here, were "really dirty," and "didn't clean the shower." I've also blamed it on the shower, saying it was just a cheap piece to begin with. There may be a little truth in both, but when I started my new approach to scrubbing, many of the stains started disappearing.

The flaws were not permanent; they were just ignored.  I had gotten so used to their presence that I thought, "That's just the way it is," but it doesn't have to be. I just needed a new approach to my familiar flaw. I think Paul wanted the Philippians to know that when it comes to dirty stains in our lives, "he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ" (Phil. 1:6).  God empowers us to be clean, not to just get comfortable with our scum.

• Do you have a habit you've been making excuses for? 
• Is there an abrasive personality trait you've been expecting others to endure? 
• Have you been accepting something that's offensive to God?

Don't blame it on the people who came before you or the temporary materials you're made of. Those of us in a relationship with Jesus Christ have been made fully clean, and the power of the Holy Spirit can penetrate the deepest stains left behind by our sin.  

Is it time for you to go back and deal with some scum?  Clean is a beautiful fragrance to wear!

7 Days in a Cafe

Here's a re-cap of the Life Off Line posts:

• Real Homemade Pancakes
• Teen Reality Check - Spending time together in marriage
• 5 Ways to Be Sure to Pray
• Are you resting? 
• How do you do w/mess? - marriage
• What's real encouragement? 
• 7 Real Habits of a Happy Marriage
• Real truth, real women, real life!
• God's Word
• Hospitality
• How to have a real fight - marriage
• 3 Ways to be a Real friend in a Virtual world
• Friendship
• News about on line friendships

So excited about February and "7 Days in a Cafe!" And NOT just about the coffee ... about what God will show me about His heart for people and how mine should follow. Join me?

Life Off Line: What's real encouragement?

In adding life online we have new ways of encouraging each other. By clicking "Like" or adding a comment we send a burst of blessing to those we know well or those we know a little and want to reach out to. But has the "Like" button deceived us into thinking that we're "doing" real encouragement?


At the beginning of this week, I shared on Do Not Depart about the danger of ignoring what we see in the mirror, about walking away from what stares back at us from the reflection of God's word. It tells us to be active and pure in how we apply it, but today it's easy to fall into the trap of giving encouragement that's barely an inch deep.


If we think we're people of faith and don't act on what we're taught, our faith is worthless. Our exposure to needs requires a response. True faith acts on the needs of others. The example James offers relates to orphans and widows. You can read all of James 1:21-27 here. Is my faith worthless or true?  With the explosion of information, we can't realistically respond to every single need we're exposed to. We wouldn't have time to get dressed! But if faith is real, it should produce real encouragement. In today's world that may look like:

• Clicking the "like" button.
• Commenting about a status. 
• Sending an email or a text. 
• Taking a meal to someone who posted that their family is ill.
• Praying about a need shared on a blog, Facebook, Twitter, or church.
• Writing a card to someone who has a Caring Bridge site. 

The worlds of online and off line encouragement are colliding to give us a wider range of options for real encouragement. Let's not just be hearers, let's be doers, encouraging one another for real. Next time we ask "How are you?" or respond "Praying for you," let's pause to consider if our faith and our encouragement are real.

Today's Life Off Line Challenge:
- Ask God to show you a need online today; choose a way to respond with real encouragement.
- Take a need you're aware of, & encourage someone off line ... a meal, card, phone call, visit?

How have you been most encouraged online? 
How are you most encouraged off line? 

Life Off Line Challenge: God's Word

There's no easy way to live Life Off Line for God. To experience God's blessing, we have to walk in His way, spend time in His Word, and listen to Him. We can't substitute for it or leave it out and still expect to be blessed. Psalm 1 takes away any doubt about that. Today we're engaging in God's Word Off and On line through Bible studies, prayer resources, worship music, and even serving. Some of us are being distracted from the truth by our tech, starting out reading a passage, only to end up posting a status or checking an email. We need to rediscover real truth, without distraction. God's Spirit still moves in real hearts, in real people, to change real lives, to bring the real God glory.

Real growth in godliness shows Off Line. It may be tweeted or posted, but it grows and shows first in Life Off Line. 

How are you engaging in God's Word? There's no excuse to say we don't have money for a guide, access to a bookstore, or a study Bible. "On line" has made God's Word accessible to countless more people, globally. Awesome! I want to share an on line opportunity that will change you off line. It's an invitation to study Ephesians with my friend Kathy Howard; it will be time well spent.

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Why don’t you just grow up? – Your invite to study Ephesians

Many of us take a hard look in the mirror this time of year. Often, what we see makes us cringe – or at least sigh. After that critical evaluation many of us commit to new diets and exercise habits. (Another course of action of course, would be to simply throw away the mirror!)


But when was the last time you evaluated your spiritual condition? Do you feel strong in the Lord and in His mighty power or is your faith flabby? Are you experiencing every spiritual blessing in Christ or is your soul undernourished?


Every Christian needs regular encouragement and strengthening from the community of faith to continue to grow. So, I invite you to join me for some spiritual encouragement through a study of Ephesians. This letter, written by Paul, is one of the most encouraging, faith-building books of the Bible. Here are a few key ways this study of Ephesians will get your faith in shape:

• · You will contemplate all the spiritual blessings God has given you through Christ.
• · You will soak in the truth of who you are in Christ.
• · You will discover how to live out your faith and grow up spiritually within the context of the church.

Won’t you join me? The introductory lesson for “Growing Up Together: A Study of Ephesians” will be posted Wednesday, January 18th with six more lessons to follow. It won’t be incredibly time intense but you will dig deep into the treasure of God’s Word.


Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen (Ephesians 3:20-21, NIV).


Are you in? Tell me how you’d like to see your faith grow in 2012.

~ Kathy

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Today's Life Off Line Challenge: 
- Read on an app, on a blog, or in a leather bound copy, but read the first chapter of Ephesians.
- Write a one sentence expression of gratitude to God for giving us His word and for allowing on line resources to spread His truth around the world. Don't have any old fashioned paper? ;) You can even leave your gratitude to the Lord as a comment!

When we don't make room

After reflecting on all of those who made room for Jesus during His days walking on earth, there have been those who have emerged who did NOT make room. They beg not to be ignored. They beg to warn and teach us. They chose not to change their hearts and lives to accommodate the Christ, and instead, they were left with loss. 

Except for their dress and language, they fit into our world today. People like:

• The leaders of Jesus' hometown synagogue who wouldn't believe the Messianic claims of "Joseph's son" and, instead, drove Him out with wrath (Luke 4:16-30).
• The pharisees who were "filled with fury" when Jesus healed a withered hand on the Sabbath; they had no insight, only accusation (Luke 6:6-11).
• The Innkeeper whose words we never hear, but who must've reported there was simply no place for them in "the Inn" where travelers found shelter, but Jesus found no place to lay His head (Luke 9:58). 
• The betrayer Judas, from the intimate group of followers, whose heart longed for greed over God. He chose a pittance of silver instead of the Savior (Luke 22:3-6).
• The ruler Herod who sat on the earthly throne, treating Jesus with contempt and using his power to find him guilty, sending him back to Pilate. Once curious about the Messiah, He showed contempt instead of compassion (Luke 23:8-15).
• The urgent and demanding crowds who cried out for Jesus to be crucified. Caught up with emotion, they opted for the chance to satisfy their lust for violence, rather than their need for restoration (Luke 23: 23, 27, 48). 

Their choices were born out of hearts so filled with their own desires and their own idols that they didn't want to make room for Jesus. The same Jesus once proclaimed by a multitude of heavenly hosts, worshiped by awestruck shepherds, sought by oriental kings, and awaited by the godly. Ultimately, some chose not to prepare room for the Savior, and they bought only LOSS. Loss of understanding, nearness to Jesus, the truth, eternal life, justice, mercy, fellowship, and so much more. 

There are others tucked in between the pages of Christ's story, and their are others tucked in between the pages of our stories. Oh, that we when we have moments of decision we would choose to make room!

Is there room on your road today?

This girl has got a lot of miles to run today! Trip downtown to women's shelter, errands for sleepover of teen girls at my house tonight, the opposite direction for a music lesson, and time at the funeral of a friend's father. I have my "road" mapped out, and I don't have a lot of room today for the unexpected.

visualbiblealive.com

On Resurrection Sunday two travelers who had followed Jesus were walking on the road to Emmaus, seven miles from Jerusalem. Talking about the unbelievable events they had witnessed, they grieved as they walked. When a stranger approached them, they didn't recognize him, and they expressed unmet hopes. (The whole story is here.)  The stranger was the risen Christ, and since Cleopas and his unnamed companion were "foolish ones and slow of heart to believe" (v.25) He explained everything to them, starting with Moses and the Prophets. I WISH I KNEW WHAT HE SHARED!!!! :)  They still didn't get it. 

When they got to Emmaus, Cleopas and his friend convinced Jesus to stay for dinner; when the Savior blessed the bread and served them ... "their eyes were opened, and they recognized him" (v.31).  Then He vanished.  And though it was night and they had come a long way, they went the seven miles back to Jerusalem to report all that had happened to the others in the group. I bet they were glad that they made room for the unexpected Stranger that day on the Emmaus Road. 

Lord, 
help me not to be in such a hurry, with tunnel vision on my agenda, that I miss YOU coming to open my eyes and enlighten my heart along the way. 

Whatever my road, I will prepare room for You.

Blind man, bold faith

Yesterday I found myself looking at a big problem and unable to see the solution. In fact, the whole picture looked rather bleak. I saw no solution, and I felt tempted to cover my head with my comforter and have a good cry ... but the dog wouldn't get off the blanket. :)

Timaeus' son Bartimaeus faced an obstacle he couldn't see through either; he was literally physically blind. To meet his needs, he positioned himself near Jericho, on the road pilgrims took to Jerusalem. Sitting there, he was likely to receive pity from those feeling waves of generosity, but their alms couldn't heal his blindness.

While at his station one day, he heard the sound of a crowd passing by and was alert to the possibilities. He hadn't crawled under a blanket in self pity; he was waiting expectantly ... for more than a few coins. When he heard that Jesus of Nazareth was the reason for the ruckus, he boldly cried out for mercy from "Jesus, Son of David." Bartimaeus may've been in the dark visually, but his heart clearly recognized the Messiah. 

Like people on the front row usually do, they tried to silence the rowdy guy in the back, but Bartimaeus cried out "all the more, 'Son of David, have mercy on me!'" (Lk 18:39). 

Jesus stopped to see the blind man and asked what he wanted. Bartimaeus didn't wasted his chance asking for alms. He asked the Messiah to restore his sight, and Jesus healed him. Like others who set aside pride or influence or expectations or insecurities, the reason for the Blind Man's healing was an issue of the heart: "Your faith has made you well" (Lk. 18:42). 

We could understand if Bartimaeus sat in the dirt and cried or covered himself up hopelessly, but to make room for Jesus, he got rid of self pity and reached out with bold faith. 

When the Son of David said the sightless man was made well, He was really saying the man's faith saved him physically and spiritually. It's not surprising, then, that the newly sighted man's response was to follow Jesus and glorify God, evidence of a disciple's heart. Near Jericho that day, the Jerusalem bound crowd saw and heard what happened to the blind man with the bold faith, and "all the people, when they saw it, gave praise to God" (Lk. 18:43).

Sometimes we can't see an answer to life's problems. There are circumstances that leave us feeling blind, tempting us to just sit down in the dirt and feel sorry for ourselves ...  even at Christmas time. There won't be room for Jesus, if we just sit on our trouble, even while the Savior is within faith's reach.

I let the dog stay on the blanket yesterday. I did not cover up or have a good cry ... this time. ;)

If a blind man can make room for Jesus by pushing out a legitimate moment of self pity & replacing it with bold faith, so can I!  You?

Have you made the move? & a Giveaway

They were common like I am. Andrew and Simon had been following for a while, but they were still keeping up with the family business they ran with their partners, James and John. On a day when crowds were trying to get near Jesus at the Sea of Galilee, the band of fishermen had just finished up a wasted day of fishing and were washing their nets when Jesus got into Simon's boat.

Jesus wanted Simon to push out from shore a little, so He could get a little space to teach the suffocating crowd. But Jesus also wanted a chance to show the brothers His authority and power. Directing Simon to cast the empty nets in again, Simon and the others were "astonished" at the overwhelming catch of fish that rewarded them after a long day of nothing.  Standing in a boat load of fish, Simon could do nothing else but fall to his knees and humble himself before the power of Jesus, much like the shepherds had done when Jesus first took on the form of a man.

• First Jesus asked Simon to put out and let Him use the boat. He wanted Simon to be willing. (Luke 4:3)
• Then Jesus asked Simon to put out his nets to get fish. He wanted Simon to be trusting. (vv. 4-5)
• Then Jesus asked Simon to leave it all behind and follow Him. He wanted Simon be committed. (vv. 10-11)
• (Read the story here)

And so the common man did. He left the familiar, the secure family business, and even his father. He moved from common to committed. He had been following, but Jesus called for whole-life following! (Also read Matt. 4:18-22 and John 1:35-42)

Common people who release the familiar know Jesus in ways only possible for those who make room. 

What could Jesus be asking you to leave on the beach, so you can move from common to 
 committed? 

Giveaway: A friend blessed me with a copy of Sarah's Young's Jesus Calling  to give away. It would be a great read the week between Christmas & New Year's or a loving way to stuff a stocking. To win enter 1-4 ways: just leave a comment and let me know one way you are making room for Jesus this Christmas season. OR share this post on Facebook, Twitter, or like the CHP Facebook page. Leave a comment letting me know if you have any/all of those multiple entries. I will post the winner on Monday, and I'll do my best to get it to you in time for Christmas! :)

What to do with your chip

We got a chip in our windshield ... weeks ago. We ignored it ... for weeks. We were busy. We're on a budget. We were busy. Did I say we were too busy to deal with the chip? ;)


But ignored chips turn into small cracks, and as they're exposed to the elements of life (like wind, rain, changes in temperature), those small cracks get bigger. I know where we're headed ... to a shattered windshield. If we don't find time to deal with this crack, we're going to have a bigger problem on our hands, and our "busyness" will be halted at a time not of our choice. It could even get dangerous.


As I've watched the chip morph into a crack and then watched the crack creep across the windshield toward my direct sight, the Lord has turned my thoughts to my life.

Are there chips in my life I'm ignoring? Maybe they're not directly in my line of vision; maybe they're in the "outer edges." Maybe no one else has noticed yet.

Do I really think my life's chip won't morph into a crack? Life elements will come, like stress, physical issues, disappointment, sin, and changes in relational climates. With each, the crack will lengthen.

Song of Solomon 2:15

Catch the foxes for us, the little foxes that spoil the vineyards, for our vineyards are in blossom.

What am I waiting for? If I'm too busy to address the little chips and cracks in my life, I'm too busy. Or I'm too busy with the wrong things.

Does my life really have to shatter and hurt someone, before I deal with that "little" chip? I can't choose the time or place or circumstances when the crack will shatter. 


It's raining at my house today, and the weather has turned colder. The crack is bigger today than it was yesterday. It's past time to do something.

Do you have a chip you need to take care of?

Congratulations to Dana, the winner of our giveaway this week with Marriage Mondays. Dana was chosen by Random.org, but she is also the granddaughter of Elaine and Hugh, the couple we were so inspired by on Monday's Marriage Survivor story. Watch for a new giveaway next Monday, along with a new story to encourage and challenge us all!

Do you know Moses wrote a Psalm?

When he was just a baby, his life was spared, while other infants were slaughtered. He remembered violent days when blood was spilled and families cried out in grief. He would've seen bodies washed away in raging waters and friends age and die in the desert. He would've witnessed how God's wrath brought lives to an end more than once, up close and personal. Most of all, he knew that having a wise heart meant understanding the brevity of life and the love of God. 

visualBiblealive.com

When Moses wrote Psalm 90, he knew what he was talking about. He has been in God's very presence, guided His people for more than 40 years in a desert, and followed God's cloud by day and fire by night. With his own family members, he would've gathered manna, finding first hand that the God who is from everlasting to everlasting also satisfies man in the morning with His love. For each day of the forty plus years he led the grumbling Israelites in the wilderness, he must've been painfully aware that to God, a thousand years is like a night or a yesterday to God. 


Read Psalm 90 in a new way, keeping in mind the journey of the man who wrote it. 


From a basket to a palace to a burning bush to an exposed sea bed to a dry wilderness, Moses knew God alone was his dwelling place and would be the dwelling place of all generations. It takes a journey to help us understand that in our deepest places. After all that journey, Moses asked:

"So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom." Psalm 90: 12

To have a wise heart, we must understand the brevity of life and the love of God.  

Do you want a wise heart? What does your journey make you ask of God? 

Finish my prayer for you in your journey:

From a ____________ to a ___________ to a ____________ to a _____________ to a __________, ____________ (your name)   learned You alone are her dwelling place and the dwelling place of all generations.   So teach her to number her days, that she may get a heart of wisdom.

Amen.

Combustible or Clinging?

Are you watching pictures of the wildfires in Texas? One government website warned, "high winds and dry conditions can set the stage for potentially severe fires, putting lives and property at risk." The region is experiencing extreme drought, making dry structures nearly combustible.


Have you ever felt so dry spiritually that you were nearly combustible? Living through a time of trial, under pressure from other people, circumstances may be ripe for a wildfire to tear through your life and leave charred remains. David was in the desert wilderness, being pursued by a one-time trusted person (Saul or David's own son Absalom) when he admitted to knowing what it feels like to be close to combustible.

"O God, you are my God; earnestly I see you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water" (Psalm 63:1). 

Texans and those who have come to their aid are fighting their parched problems with all they have to throw at it from the ground and from the air. David didn't just take the heat either; he threw the power of God back at it.

Because he knew God's steadfast love is "better than life:"

• he sought to know God ... in the midst of his drought
• he worshiped God for who He is ... not deterred by his problems
• he thought about God in dark desert moments  ... in bed, alone
• he meditated on God's truth in times of temptation ... in the "watches of the night"

We need to cling to something. If you feel like you're "clinging" by a thread to the life God wants for you, follow David's example in the parched land:  "My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me" (v.8). 


Like David, you'll find living water for your parched throat ... so you can praise God. You'll find a shady place of shelter ... under the shadow of God's "wings." When we're under attack, we can focus on God's steadfast love instead of the heat of life. Don't give in and combust, friend! Before we get to a dangerous place, let's let God satisfy our dry souls. 

Why combust when we can cling?

Take a step to satisfy your thirst today: 

• Take time to read Psalm 63 aloud.
• Make a list of the words David used to describe God in Psalm 63.
• Listen to praise music that will speak to your spirit.
• Carry a water bottle ... as a reminder that the answer to your thirst is right at hand.

Can you relate to Ethan?

I think I can relate to Ethan, and I am guessing you can too. Ethan the Ezrahite (ever heard of him?) was grieved because his loved ones were in distress, and he knew it was because of God's wrath against His anointed kingly line - David's family. Have you ever felt sick over the distress in someone's life, all the while knowing that God was chastising them and chasing them down because they wandered from Him? We long for our prodigals to come home, but we hate it when it has to hurt to get them to come.  

Now can you relate to Ethan?


Even when it feels like we're abandoned by God, His love and His faithfulness have not changed. What makes me (and Ethan) so sure? It's a covenant thing.


Next week I'm starting a new Bible study, "Covenant: God's Enduring Promise," with a couple of groups of women at my church. We're using THIS study published by Lifeway, and my early study is SO exciting! I'll be reflecting on one lesson each Friday here at Come Have a Peace starting Sept. 16, so if you want to order a copy and join me in the study, you'll have the bigger picture of what we're learning.



Knowing God has made a covenant with us (a promise, a pledge, a contract) gives us confidence to ask God to be true to His word. A covenant involves a choice based on love that is STEADFAST, a word used throughout this Psalm. God can NOT go against what He has promised. He can NOT fail; it would go against who He is. He says, "I will not violate my covenant or alter the word that went forth from my lips" (Ps. 89:34).  Even if we suffer and experience shame and pain as a result, like God's people and Ethan's loved ones, God still keeps His promises. That's why His people could call on Him to be true in Ethan's day and why we can call on Him to be true today.

 I agree with these words of Ethan's song:  "I will sing of the steadfast love of the Lord, forever; with my mouth I will make known your faithfulness to all generations." (89:1)

If you know what it is to be heavy hearted about a suffering loved one, even if it's the loving rebuke of a heavenly Father, call out to our covenant keeping, steadfast loving God. He listened to Ethan, and He'll listen to us, too.

Was there a time when you felt like God had turned away from you? What did He use to show His love?

Marriage Mondays ~ Mrs. Adulteress

Women/girls are pursuing men/boys with a new boldness, a 21st century kind of boldness. I know, because I have a teenage son! The cultural "new normal" among females intensifies temptation for men to succumb to impure relationships. Tomorrow I'm posting at Scripture Dig on what Proverbs has to say about Adultery & Sexuality. Today my teammate Stephanie is posting about wisdom from Proverbs about the Wife Your Marriage Deserves. 


As I studied fatherly warnings to a son regarding adultery, I landed in Proverbs chapter 7, where I noted words describing the alluring seductress:  dressed immodestly, wily heart, loud, wayward, doesn't stay home, waiting on purpose, assertive, physically bold, eager, intentional, seductive, smooth, compelling. 


I expected all of that (except for wily ... not a word I often use ;) It means crafts.), but I did NOT remember noticing the words of verse 19. WHOA!  Check the version. Get out the concordance. Drink some real coffee. Did I just read what I thought I read???? 

"... with bold face she says to him ... (v.19) For my husband is not at home; he has gone on a long journey..."

HUSBAND!?!?!? The seductress the father is warning his son to avoid is a married woman. She's in my classification. I'm in "her club." I have something in common with her. She promised to be faithful to another man ... just like I did. Probably just like you did.

How does a married woman become an adulteress?

• She had the wrong heart - image of purity, but religion without a relationship (v14)
• She had the wrong habits - secrecy, outside of her husband's knowledge (vv19-20)
• She had the wrong house - using her own house to entertain sin (vv17-19)

Mrs. Prov. 7 had religion, but no relationship, and it showed up in her marriage. This gal even offered her sacrifices and paid her vows, but she didn't do it to know God and walk in His ways.  Her image when the sun was shining may've earned her a spot on a ministry team, but "in the twilight, in the evening, at the time of night and darkness" her real heart called out to satisfy her lust. She rejected God's gift of marital intimacy. What does the physical intimacy in your marriage say about your heart?


She was practicing the wrong habits, even preparing her bed with the best linens and spices to arouse him. She planned to invite her lover in and went out where she could check out the options and invite him in. In modern language, she was picking her "hottest" profile picture, in case her college flame happened by. She was clicking on the "Meet Singles in Your Area" option next to her email, because she tells herself it's harmless. While her husband was away on business, she didn't plan for his return home; she planned to maximize her time by self-indulgence. Her habits were leading her straight on "the way to Sheol, going down to the chambers of death," (7:27) death of the blessings God intended for her.  Do you welcome or resist your husband's knowledge of the details of your days?


The matron of Proverbs 7 lived in a house she had not made her "theirs." In fact, "her feet do not stay at home," (12) because she was busy pursuing what she wanted. She didn't have time for "menial things" like fixing dinner and changing the sheets and texting her husband a quick "I love you today." She hadn't yielded her life to become one, instead of two, and she hadn't devoted herself to making a home to nurture and satisfy her husband. How can you focus on satisfying someone else, when you're busy satisfying yourself? Are you using your house to entertain sin?


The married gal of Proverbs 7 would've spent a lot of time and money primping from head to toe. Where would she be if she lived in your town? God tells us that He values a different beauty focus, and that's the emphasis that satisfies a husband and brings joy to a wife: 

"Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God."  1 Peter 3:3-4

No doubt that the wife of Proverbs 7 left her husband in her heart long before she welcomed a stranger into her bed. Only God can take a sinful heart, make it pure, sanctify it, and transform it to want to think and do holy things. Our sin nature urges us to give in to our selfish side, our prideful side, our brash side, our attention seeking side ... our adulterous side. Oh, God give us a daily desire to be married women who have a heart for You, who pursue You with our habits, and who honor You in our homes. 

Cultivating Confident Kids

Did you see the news about the school shooting that was meant to be bigger than the Columbine shooting of 1999? 

Many parents nowadays do their children a disservice. By hearing things like "You're the best" or "You can achieve anything you want" or "You'll always be a winner" ... we set our kids up for false confidence. The more I know God, the more I understand that the truth is I am weak, and He is strong, and I can do nothing apart from Him. Our kids are in the process of understanding that. They need "real confidence," and they can have it.

The more I seek God, the more confident I am.

Real confidence is based on God's constant protection. If you saw how Jared Cano's plans to carry out a school shooting in Tampa, FL were thwarted Wednesday, you probably need confidence for your child, too. This morning I told the officer (can you believe it?) at our high school "Thank you so much for being here." But real confidence is based on God's constant protection.


Psalm 27 tells us God invites us to seek Him (v.8). We can do that, because He shelters us (vv.5-6), even when we feel vulnerable and unsheltered by others who should shelter us.

Knowing God wants to be sought as our shelter caused the Psalmist to lead the way in a confident response: We will worship Him (vv. 4-6).  We believe He will hear us and do good (v.13).  We will have a teachable spirit to be led by Him (v.11).

Confidence in God, according to Psalm 27, is the answer for things like evil doers, adversaries, foes, armies, wars, false witnesses, and even plans for school shootings in 2011.   Knowing this, the Psalmist wants ONE THING from God:

"One thing have I asked of the LORD, that will I seek after:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life"

If you have a child or a friend or a loved one, they WILL face a crisis sometime this year. I will face a crisis sometime this year, and so will you. Don't brace yourself in fear. Seeking God in a crisis cultivates confidence.  It gives us the guts to shout with David:

"The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?"

Stick THAT in your child's lunchbox! :) The more they seek Him, the more confident they'll be. Cultivate that real confidence by:

1. Praying using God's words with your child.
2. Reading scripture together daily, even if it's a "bite." 
3. Keeping verse cards in the car, so you don't let them go without some truth.
4. Praying at strategic times, like when they go to a place like school or an event.
5. Saying out loud that you are confident God will be with, watch over and hear them.

I want to share this prayer with you, based on Psalm 27. It's set on a photograph that will help to imprint the image on your heart and mind (or that of your child) that God is our confidence, and on HIM we can stand firm. Why not pray this prayer with your child before they go to school or to "that practice" or into "that group" of kids or wherever they go? It's based on Psalm 27 and uses words right out of scripture. I pray it will help your child to be filled with a fresh wind of confidence and that you might find you're swept up in that too!

Psalm 27 Prayer

Standing in trouble

I hope you've been watching news this week. Words like navy seals, London riots, Afghanistan, Syrian unrest, stock market loss, political division, starving children, and polygamist abuses have peppered the daily reports. In my email this morning, I found a writer calling for civil disobedience in our nation's capital. Trouble.

Standing in trouble takes trusting in God.

As King of the nation of Israel, David knew the meaning of trouble and the nature of fickle affection. He even knew what it meant to be the cause of trouble, to have people vie for his royal role, to have some support and some hate, and he knew what it meant to watch others suffer. When he wrote the short royal Psalm 20, he gave the people a pattern for the attitude they should have toward their leader, and he wrote about the King himself. He was talking about God's chosen leader of Israel.


Does God still "choose" leaders for us today? Daniel 2:21 makes it clear that, "He changes times and seasons; he removes kings and sets up kings; he gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to those who have understanding ..."  God sets up the leaders in the world, allowing them to rule for a season. 

In verses 1-5 of Psalm 20 the attitude and response to the King is:

• that God would answer when the King prays in times of need
• that God's name would protect the King
• that he would experience help from the "sanctuary," where God's presence was most felt
• that the Lord would remember the offerings and gifts the King gives to God
• that God would fulfill his plans and desires that come from God
• that God would answer his prayers
• that the people would rejoice when the King is helped and identify themselves as God's people

David challenged the fickle Hebrews to respond to their King with prayer and hope, knowing they could do that, because they ultimately trusted in God. Standing in trouble takes trusting in God.

David knew leaders are not the source of help; help comes from God. As a warrior who had been in violent battles and seen strength clash with fear, David had learned where to place his trust. 


Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.
They are brought to their knees and fall, but we rise up and stand firm. (vv.7&8)


We might not be talking about chariots and horses in our day, but we have stock portfolios and governments and armies and salaries and jobs and relationships where we often put our trust. God can choose to use anyone or any event He chooses, but HE is the source of victory, the only One worthy of our trust. Standing in trouble takes trusting in God.


My Dad and I were talking the other day about how the world seems to be shaking with trouble in every place. It can be overwhelming. It's part of what motivated me to join with World Help in the Got Milk project to provide milk for children for a single year. We've raised $4,155 of the needed $7,200.  The news and images of trouble motivated me to pray about how I can help in Africa, and God gave me S.O.S. ~ Somalia on Saturdays. Maybe God wants to use us to answer some of the suffering ... in HIS name. My Dad said he felt compelled to turn off the news and just pray. It's a great place to start.



Standing in trouble takes trusting in God.

• Do you trust in God enough to pray for your leaders? 
• Are you feeling overwhelmed or shaken by trouble in the world or in your own life?  
• How has God been your help when you've trusted Him?

A song ... so we'll remember

Yesterday we reflected on how David's past prompted him to write a song to dedicate the temple in the future, after he was gone from this world. I also think I may've suggested that King David was the first to do ZUMBA. ;)

We are so forgetful. It's harder than ever today to keep facts in mind, because we're inundated with information. We don't have time to absorb content or even "mentally file it away" before we're hit with new facts and ideas. A song is a great way to help us remember vital truths. The nation of Israel used songs to mentally (and in their hearts) hang on to their history, and it still works for us today.


Psalm 136 repeats one line over and over, 26 times, once every verse:  "... for his steadfast love endures forever." His steadfast love is His covenant love, His love that is pledged to us, love that cannot be undone, love that always follows through, love that lasts forever.


The point is that because of who He is, what He's done, and how He cares for me, God deserves my thanks and praise for His steadfast love.  It can be gut-wrenching-hard to remember this when we're in the midst of mess or pain or angst,  but those are the times we need to remember God the most.

The song begins with a truly beautiful section about our Creator God: 
1Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever.
²Give thanks to the God of gods, for his steadfast love endures forever.
³Give thanks to the Lord of lords, for his steadfast love endures forever; ⁴to him who alone does great wonders, for his steadfast love endures forever;
⁵to him who by understanding made the heavens, for his steadfast love endures forever;
⁶to him who spread out the earth above the waters, for his steadfast love endures forever;
⁷to him who made the great lights, for his steadfast love endures forever;
⁸the sun to rule over the day, for his steadfast love endures forever;
⁹the moon and stars to rule over the night, for his steadfast love endures forever;

The  rest of the Psalm is the part that helps God's people remember ... all He's done in the past to intervene, to provide, to exercise that steadfast love. It's so good to remember. Maybe you'll want to do some remembering with me today by personalizing the "remembering parts" ...

• God's character to me is ...........
• God's creation of me is .............
• My Egypt was (set free from being a slave) ..........
• My Promised Land (God's blessings to me) ...........
• God's continuing care for me now is ..........
• I want to thank Him for ...........

Because of who He is, what He's done, and how He cares for me, God deserves my thanks and praise for His steadfast love. 

His steadfast love endures forever!

Now in case you're like me (and King David) and songs help you remember, let me give you this song as a gift, sung by a church choir in Nigeria. Nigeria is not in the horn of Africa, but on the continent of Africa. Maybe it will also remind our hearts of needs in Africa right now and of SOS this weekend and our chance to help display the steadfast love of the Lord. I'll warn you, the picture quality is not great, but I think you'll agree that the quality of the voices is ... heavenly.  (If you receive this via email, click on the post title so you can enjoy the video. You'll be so glad you did.)

(Based on Lamentations 3:21-23)

You don't get it either

David admitted he didn't get it, and I know I don't get it.    You don't "get it" either."   It" is how God can so intimately know all about us, everywhere, every place, every time. In Psalm 139 David said, "Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, it is high; I cannot attain it." In other words, he couldn't grasp how God could know him so completely.


I got the message early one morning this week, and my garbage thoughts were immediately churned up,  troubled, frustrated and conflicted. My mouth wanted to spew out my feelings, but the words of Psalm 139 reigned me in. God has intimate knowledge of me; He searches me out and "knows" me. That means He is intimately acquainted with everything about me, all my ways (vv.1-3). Even from what seems like a distance, He knows me. Nothing is hidden. Even if I try not to speak my garbage thoughts, He knows even before I start to spew what really fills my heart, "Even before a word is on my tongue" (v.4).


Should we try to hide? It can't be done. David asked the same thing, "Where can I go from your Spirit?" (v.7) We can't run away or be in a place out of His full awareness. Not heaven, not hell, not as far as east is from west, not in the darkest place. Even in the suffering place. Everywhere ... He leads and holds those who are His (v.10). 

This truth has been such a comfort to me. 


This week we talked about suffering as described in Psalm 39, and I showed you my illustration of it from my devotional notebook. The Psalm made us ask, "What now?" If you know you're suffering, and it may even be your own doing, what now? From the same writer who had lived on the run, experienced his own agony, and hidden out, the words of Psalm 139 make it clear we can't escape God's full "knowing" of us and all we think and feel.

Why can't I escape Him?

• He is my maker. vv. 13-16 ... Even in the dark isolation of the womb, He knew me.
• All of my days are in His book. vv. 16 ... He knows every event, good and bad.
• He thunders out the pronouncement that I am wonderfully made. v. 14
• His thoughts toward me are VAST; He thinks of me ... a lot. vv. 17-18
• He has the authority to restrain evil. vv. 19-20
• Not everyone is glad God knows all about us; He has enemies. vv. 19-22

Though He knows me in my ugly state of garbage thinking and suffering, He still wants to search me and know me. He wants me to invite Him to keep searching and keep knowing:

• my heart
• my thoughts
• my wicked ways

In the midst of my suffering, despite my instinct to hide myself from the God who sees and knows all, He wants me to invite His leadership in my life. He wants me to rise up out of my own garbage and the garbage around me and be led "in the way everlasting!" That's His way. That's back to the godly way of Psalm 1. The way everlasting is the way He unfolds in His book, the Bible.

• Are you crying out to the God, asking Him to search you, know you, and lead you?
• Are you spending time in His Word, so you'll know His ways?

Life is filled with suffering, but out of it we can cry like David: "Search me! Know my heart! See if there's garbage in me! Lead me in YOUR ways, not mine."

Psalm 1 ~ I have to ask ...

I think the email subscriptions are running smoothly again, so feel free to subscribe to get new posts in your email. 

Since we're lingering at the entrance to Psalms for a few days, I want to encourage you to stop by Scripture Dig today, where I'm writing about what it looks like to be "streamside" 24/7.  Is it very realistic in today's world? Find out....

• How do I avoid standing/walking/sitting with the wrong crowd?
• How do I meditate 24/7?
• How do I stay by the stream?

Read more here....

But on Come Have a Peace today, I just want to pause and use Psalm 1 to ask some personal questions of myself. Maybe you'll ask the same questions for your own self today.

Read Psalm 1 below or here. (My response questions are in red.)

Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked,  Lord, do I do life with the advice of people who don't fear You?

nor stands in the way of sinners, Do I position myself in the lifestyle of those who reject you?

nor sits in the seat of scoffers; Do I get comfortable and make my life with and in a place of those who mock You with their morals and beliefs?

but his delight is in the law of the LORD, Show me, Lord, do I really enjoy and desire more of Your word?
and on his law he meditates day and night. Do words of Your truth come to mind often throughout the circumstances of my day ... and night?

JoHanna ... spending time "streamside"

He is like a tree planted by streams of water Am I positioned for and practicing a constant supply of words from the Bible and power from Your Spirit?

that yields its fruit in its season, Am I really bearing fruit that benefits others and glorifies You?

and its leaf does not wither. Do I have a tendency to stop drinking and dry up? How dry is my soul?

In all that he does, he prospers. Can I say that my whole life is intent on being a fruit producer that blesses others?


The wicked are not so, but are like chaff that the wind drives away. Am I useless or irritating in the Kingdom? Am I easily blown off of Your course and into the world?

Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment, How ready am I to "stand" in hardships now, and am I prepared to meet You one day?

nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous; Can I say with confidence that I am counted as "righteous" in Your eyes, because Jesus has forgiven me and claimed my life?

for the LORD knows the way of the righteous, I know You are fully aware of all my "ways," and I ask You to search me and know me and steer me towards righteousness.

but the way of the wicked will perish. I want to live abundant life now, with the hope of eternal life with You! Help me to be the life tree and really LIVE!


 Tomorrow ... one final day to soak up Psalm 1 together. Time in the "gateway" has been good, and I hope you, like me, have seen new and wonderful things as we've lingered there together.

Scripture Dig Favorites

In the past month, my Scipture Dig team shared some of our favorite posts from each other's blogs. Today I'm sharing a post from Kathy Howard that really resonates with me about fearing God. Here's a sneak peek:

"I’ve never had a pink scooter or a big, yellow dog, but when Kathy used them to paint a picture about life with the God we love, I could relate. I realized that I’m actually a lot more acquainted with pink scooters than I thought I was, and I’m a lot more like Kathy’s Chihuahua Harley than I want to admit! Kathy uses the ordinary to point to the divine in this inspirational challenge about fearing God, first posted in January 2009 on kathyhoward.org." ............ You can read Kathy's post about "Pink Scooters and Big, Yellow Dogs" here. 

This month, my other favorites from the team have included:
Doing Our Husbands Good by Sandra
Philippians, Losing & Winning by Stephanie
Emotional Modesty by Kristi
Laundry Lessons by Teri Lynne


These are encouraging and inspirational posts that help me stay focused on being the woman God wants me to be. Anyone else out there need that kind of help?


Their favorites from Come Have a Peace included:
21,900 Little Things, a favorite of Sandra
Kristi's favorite, Catch Me to Lead Me!
Verbal Accessories, chosen by Teri Lynne
Kathy's choice, My New Favorite Coffee Shop
Be a Woman of the World, shared by Stephanie