Monday, August 22, 2011

Marriage Mondays ~ Plan 4Your Man

Today at Scripture Dig I'm kicking off our Proverbs study about wisdom for everyday life. Take a look here.

One of the places where I need everyday wisdom is in the use of my time. I've been using a planner since my early teens. It's a helpful tool for me in making my days match my priorities. Despite new technologies, I still love a basic, spiral bound, paper planner. It works for me. Every now and then, a look at my planner makes me think, "Okay, Julie. Let's get it under control." My alphabet priorities help remind me about what matters most.

Husbands take time. Do you plan time for your husband?

I was busy in the kitchen one afternoon when Jeff stepped in front of me and put his arms around me. I responded, "I don't think you're on my schedule this afternoon." I was being playful ... sort of. :/  He replied, "I supersede the schedule." He was being playful ... sort of.


A vibrant marriage takes time, and that means wives have to give some of our 24 hours to our husbands. What makes it so hard sometimes, since we love them and want to be intimately known by them?
  • kids
  • work
  • stuff of life
  • energy
  • useless distractions
We all only have 24 hours to give to things in our lives. I'm happy to give up ironing. :) I need God to teach me the value of my time, so I will be wise with it (Psalm 90:12). When I look at my planner, it needs to reveal that I value time with my husband. And I need to be available and flexible with my time FOR my husband.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband,
But she who shames him is like rottenness in his bones.
Proverbs 12:4

If a great wife is a crown for her man, it really is a shame if she's so busy that he never gets a chance to enjoy the glory and the honor she brings him. I, for one, don't want Jeff's bones to rot. :) I have to ask the Lord, daily, to steer my time. One safeguard I have for myself is to "block out" Jeff's day off, so that it's off limits for appointments with work, projects, etc. I leave it open to spend some time with him, to give him priority. I've been blessed over and over by that simple act of crossing that day out on my planner.

  • How can I be a helper to my husband if I just really don't have time in my days to help him? 
  • How can I be intimately bonded to him if I don't have energy to connect with him? 
  • How can I keep a home that is a haven for him if I'm too busy to get it together at home?

Husbands take time. 
Do your plans show that you value your marriage?
Does the quality of your married life reflect the time you spend?
How can you plan to carve out time to be "happily married?"

Today is Day #1 of the birthday week giveaways! Today I'm giving away a copy of Sharon Jaynes' book Becoming the Woman of His Dreams along with a $5 Starbucks card ... perfect for sitting down to review how you're using your time and planning your days. :) To enter ... each of the following counts as an entry; leave a comment letting me know how many "entries" you have:   "Like" the CHP page on Facebook, tweet a link to this post, or leave a comment sharing one way you prioritize time with your husband.  I'll announce the winner tomorrow!
(Only those in the lower 48 states are eligible for this prize, and entries close at midnight tonight!)

17 COMMENTS ~ Click here to leave a COMMENT:

Mary@The Calm of His Presence said...

Happy Birthday week! Yes it is so important to make time for our husbands! One of the ways Jeff & I make time for each other is to put the kids to bed at a decent time so we can talk about our day before we are both too exhausted.

Julie_Sanders said...

That's a wise pattern to start, Mary. We've been really good at that, but now that our kids are teens, they're staying up later than we are! Once we realized the "trend," we had to figure out how to trouble shoot that one. :) New challenges in every season of marriage ...

Julie Sanders
www.comehaveapeace.blogspot.com


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Katie said...

Good word, Julie!  Hoping to start Brad and I's engagement and upcoming marriage off on the right track with the right priorities.  It's hard finding the balance between investing in our relationship but not neglecting our many other friendships.  I have 2 entries with liking CHP on facebook =)

Julie_Sanders said...

Thanks Katie! I know you and Brad will get off to a great start. You are wise to set those good patterns now, so you can carry them into your marriage. Of course, it's also wise to fit in coffee with a friend ;)  .... will set that date with you soon!  You're entered in the giveaway! It's a book I love and have been so glad to give to others before and "in" marriage.

Julie Sanders
www.comehaveapeace.blogspot.com


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Traci said...

This is awesome... I love how you said "sort of"... oh how easily we "play" but it reflects what comes out of our heart at the time.

Love your points... as always!

Love,Traci at  Ordinary Inspirations
http://www.ordinaryinspirations.blogspot.com

Tgalligher said...

I have 2 entries!! Woo Hoo

Mroberts4 said...

I carve out time each morning with a 3mile run with my hubby :) thanks Julie for your continued encouragement

Kalyn Comings said...

Just tweeted your giveaway - looks like a good book!

Ella said...

my husband and I go on a date night every Wednesday and it always gives me something to look forward to and us a chance to talk!  love it!

Ella said...

2 entries for me... :)

Julie_Sanders said...

Great!  Thanks Kalyn! It's an excellent book. One lady I gave the book to said that it literally changed her marriage and their home. It's very encouraging.

Julie Sanders
www.comehaveapeace.blogspot.com


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Julie_Sanders said...

You are not only a woman who is wise ... you're in good shape! That sounds like time well spent in many ways.
Julie Sanders
www.comehaveapeace.blogspot.com


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Julie_Sanders said...

You are not only a woman who is wise ... you're in good shape! That sounds like time well spent in many ways.

Julie_Sanders said...

Wise woman, Ella. Date nights are worth doing the work to make it happen in any season of life!

Kristi Stephens said...

I've been wanting to read that book! I actually just requested it at the library but didn't make it over there before the hold expired... a statement about my own planning schedule, I suppose. :)

So appreciate this challenge and reminder.

Rachael McKinney said...

It has taken me the last few years to really appreciate and understand setting aside special time for my husband. As life has gotten more complicated, this has become more difficult. But now, we both have Sundays off, and so we reserve those as a strict family day-no extras. For me, he has Monday off (and I don't) and I have specifically said no meetings, no going out to dad's, not even running extra miles that day. It's my evening to focus on my husbands needs. It's a challenge, but it is worth it. And God is using those little moments.

Julie_Sanders said...

Rach, God will always bless those boundaries. Sometimes we have to "hold fast" and firm, but it's worth it, friend. :)

Julie Sanders
www.comehaveapeace.blogspot.com


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