Monday, April 11, 2011

Marriage Mondays ~ Creating Conversations

After this weekend my eyes were tired, but my heart was full. I had a sweet time of being with my sisters and friends at our West Park women's retreat, and I had the privilege of serving with my Scripture Dig sisters. One of the awesome things about getting away together at a retreat is that we have time to talk. And as we talk, we freshen bonds, we deepen relationships, we make new friendships, we grow, and we're encouraged. My Scripture Dig sister Kristi Stephens and I bunked together in our beautiful room, and at night we just wanted to keep on talking and sharing. It was sweet.

Our world today doesn't lend itself to conversations, especially deep conversations. We communicate in short text messages, voice mails, 140 character Twitter messages, and quick exchanges coming and going.When communication in marriage is whittled down to bursts of talk instead of true conversation, it doesn't take long for distance to develop, for us to feel "unknown," and for bonds to become strained. We just get caught up in the things of life. To live as one and make a life together, we have to do more than "talk," we have to have conversations. 

When we fall out of the habit of talking, it can be hard to get back into a good groove. Today I want to give you a practical tool to help you start or re-start or nurture conversation with your spouse.  Click to download for COUPLES CONVERSATION CARDS. This will take you to a Google Docs file. If you can't download it, please email me, and I'll send you the file directly. Print, cut, and use one "card" per conversation. They would be great to use:

  • at bedtime
  • on a date
  • over a cup of coffee
  • as you travel
You can use them "under the table" ;) or out in the open, but use them as door openers of communication. You will notice they are not all "deep," and that's by design. Most women are EAGER to talk, but husbands are often threatened or discouraged by feeling forced to jump in to the "cold water" of deep conversation too fast.

These "Couples Conversation Cards" are meant to get the talking started. And as you talk, remember that God's Word has  practical principles for how we are to talk; we are wise to apply truths like this one to our Couples Conversations:

1 Peter 3:10-11

For, “Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech. They must turn from evil and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it."
Enjoy connecting over the conversations these cards will help you start. I'm praying that the fruit of intimacy will grow from the time you take to talk. As you use them, let me know how it goes! I would love to hear what cards are your favorites, what cards might not work well for you, and suggestions you would have for others.   And as we take time to talk ... let's make sure we listen to the hearts of our husbands. If you know of someone who would benefit from a little help getting started in conversation, share these cards through Facebook or Twitter with the icon at the bottom of this post, under the Linky list.

(If you receive this via email, you need to click on the post title "Creating Conversations" to go to the actual blog page and to comment at the bottom OR ... feel free to comment on the Come Have a Peace Facebook page.)

If you want to link up, please remember Marriage Mondays posts should: 1) Be all about marriage 2) include a Biblical base for truth applied to marriage 3) include a link to this post. Thanks for following the guidelines. ;)

7 COMMENTS ~ Click here to leave a COMMENT:

trooppetrie said...

I have saved this linky for months and really want to get better about making my blog glorify God. thank you for hosting, let me know if my post is what you are looking for

Dana said...

I like the idea of having conversation cards for couples. When my husband and I sit still and REALLY talk it's amazing how much we've changed over the years. We find it funny, but I'm sure those same changes could cause others to pull apart. Thanks for sharing. God bless!

Julie_Sanders said...

So true ... and maybe the danger is that if we don't take that time to "really" talk, we miss out on staying close as we change. Enjoy the cards!

Julie Sanders

Mary Joy said...


My husband and I set aside time almost every day to really talk. Its a great experience...we have to really prioritize to make it happen but it is our favorite time of day. We have to be careful or we end up talking for hours... LOL I am working on doing better at listening completely and not interrupting him. It goes so much better when I do. :D

Building Home with Him,

Mary Joy

Julie_Sanders said...

I love your wise perspectives, Mary Joy. I know your husband feels loved as you give him the gift of listening. :)

Julie Sanders

LeAnn H. said...

How convenient - you posted this on our anniversary! Although I didn't actually see it on that day (we went out on a date!), I have now retrieved it and printed off the cards for a use at a later time. Excellent - thank you!!

Julie_Sanders said...

Then just remember it was for you ;)  I hope you enjoy them!

Julie Sanders